It might be the skyrocketing hormones that made me find the courage to write something aiming to be poetic yet literally hard on the heart.
Grief has been written many times before and grief will be written as many times as it will be felt.
Tonight it felt fresh. It felt new. And it felt familiar. The quiet times were filled with emptiness and fake smiles.
There’s been a lot of ups and downs in which we wished he was still here.
A wish that will never be granted.
A wish we will keep wishing.
2 years ago, we had to start fresh not knowing where to begin. We started wondering how to fill that space. Who will fill that space. Only to realize that that space doesn’t need filling.
That space made us stronger. Made us better people. Shaped our lives into something more meaningful.
We started to appreciate life a little bit more.
We started to appreciate our mom a little bit more.
We started to a appreciate the little things because loss will be inevitable, and valuing every little thing makes it a bit more bearable.
But as always, those who we lost has found a better place.
The sadness and grief were replaced with relief because we are certain that they’re ok.
And if they are, we are too.
I wrote these notes when I was filled up with memories of my Dad and thought I’d share it as a tribute to him on his 2nd death anniversary. I was especially triggered by Ed Sheeran’s song, Supermarket Flowers.
You were an angel in the shape of my mum
You got to see the person I have become
Spread your wings and I know
That when God took you back he said, “Hallelujah
Sorry for being extra emotional today. I promise to get back to beauty as soon as possible!